


The Tiny Ushiwakas

by dr_alwaysthiswise



Series: Haikyuu Captain Squad_BroTotally Spies [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Mild Hurt/Comfort, captainsquad, totallyspiesau, ushiwaka has kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:01:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28311309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dr_alwaysthiswise/pseuds/dr_alwaysthiswise
Summary: Ushijerry asks Oikawa and Bokuto for a favor, and it's definitely not what they expected.
Relationships: Bokuto Koutarou & Kuroo Tetsurou & Oikawa Tooru & Sawamura Daichi & Ushijima Wakatoshi, Bokuto Koutarou & Oikawa Tooru, Ushijima Wakatoshi/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Haikyuu Captain Squad_BroTotally Spies [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2073387
Kudos: 4





	The Tiny Ushiwakas

“Oikawa, Bokuto, I have a favor to ask of you two.” Ushijerry says after summoning the two of them into his office.

Ushijerry’s serious face was a tad darker than usual, and Oikawa couldn’t help but frown in response. Whatever favor Ushijerry is going to ask, it must be serious, and seeing Ushijerry going so far as to bow his down to them makes Oikawa slightly uncomfortable. (Another part of him, though, wants to take a picture to commemorate this moment). 

“What is it, Jerry?” Bokuto asks.

Ushijerry straightens up. “I’ll cut to the chase. There’s a very dangerous mission overseas that requires my immediate presence.”

Oikawa raises an eyebrow, wondering if Ushijerry is going to ask them to assist him on this dangerous mission?

“The problem is what to do with the children.”

_Hold on, what children?_ Oikawa’s brain freezes and stumbles at the words that naturally left Ushijerry’s mouth.

“With my wife currently out of town, I was supposed to look after the children. However, I cannot and definitely will not bring them with me abroad, especially since it’ll be very dangerous there.”

Oh yeah, Ushijima fucking Wakatoshi is married and has kids, Oikawa reminded himself, mentally patting himself on the back for remembering that small, slightly unimportant, tidbit. “I need strong and capable people to look after them during the time I am gone. Since you two happen to be available, I wanted to ask if you guys can look after them for me.”

Oh my god, absolutely not, Oikawa thinks to himself.

“Absolutely! We got your back Jerry! We’d love to look after the little Ushijerry’s!”

Oikawa vaguely remembers not explicitly agreeing to this. “Thank you Bokuto, Oikawa. They’re usually really good and obedient, so you shouldn’t have any problems. Oh, and don’t call me Ushijerry in front of them. They don’t understand why I need a different name for my second job.”

“Gotcha! So when do we meet the kiddos, Ushiwaka?” Bokuto asks, ignoring Oikawa’s glares and glances.

“In a few minutes. I asked Tendou to go pick them up before we leave for South Korea. Wait here, and I’ll bring them up to meet you.”

Once Ushijerry’s out of earshot, Oikawa grabs Bokuto by the collar and starts shaking him. “Why the hell did you agree?! Don’t you know how troublesome children are?!” he screams, his eyes seeing red.

Bokuto simply grins and takes it all with stride. “Relax bro. Ushije- I mean, Ushiwaka said they were good kids. We’re going to be fine.”

Oikawa lets out an exasperated sigh. “Bokuto, that’s what every parent says about their child. Once their parents are gone, children become little monsters. The younger they are, the more monstrous and devious! Do you even remember how old they are? If they need a babysitter, then they’re obviously really young! Also, he said “ _children_ ,” that’s more than one! How many kids does Ushiwaka have again? Oh my god, I don’t remember.” Oikawa starts groaning at the trouble Ushijerry’s kids will cause.

Bokuto does not understand Oikawa’s panic or even notice his irritation because he just smiles and responds: “Oh yeah! I think he said they’re five? And I don’t remember how many there are, but there’s definitely more than one. So it means more fun and games! Hey, maybe we can play volleyball!”

Oikawa groans as he remembers his days back in highschool when he had to babysit his nephew, Takeru. As much as he loved Takeru, he was such a brat, and that brat was in elementary school. This time, he has to deal with more than one kid, all of whom are in kindergarten, AND, they’re fucking Ushijima Wakatoshi’s kids. That in itself is already a bad sign. “Bokuto-chan, you’re on your own for this! There’s no way that I’m going to-”

Oikawa cuts off when the doors swing open, and Ushijerry walks in with his children. “Okay everyone, these are the guys who will be looking after you while daddy is going on a job.”

Oikawa stops in mid-sentence and he starts to count. One. Two. Three. Four. One. Two. Three. Four. One. Two. Three. Crap there are four kids. Four. Four kids who are all five year olds who go to Kindergarten. And Oikawa forgot that kindergarteners wear fucking adorable yellow hats and matching blue outfits.

“This is Bokuto-oniisan and this is Oikawa-oniisan.” Ushijerry introduces them to the four kindergarteners (all in matching yellow hats and blue uniforms mind you).

Four pairs of large, soft, brown eyes look at him and Bokuto, and Oikawa is about to die. There’s no way these are Ushiwaka’s kids. They’re way too cute and they’re all--actually that always permanent straight face trademark and those serious stares are identical to Ushiwaka’s. But there’s no way Ushiwaka was that cute as a kid, despite the uncanny resemblance all four of them have to their dad.

“Hey, hey, hey little Ushiwaka’s! You guys can call me Kou-nii! Nice to meet you, what are your names?” Bokuto asks, crouching down to their height.

It was silent. The four kids only stare back at Bokuto, and Bokuto stares back, but he is taken aback by how silent and still these kids are. After some time, all four kids look up to their dad, their heads tilted in the cutest manner, and oh my God, Oikawa needs a tissue. Almost as if understanding their little head tilts, Ushiwaka gives them a small pat on the head. “It’s okay, they’re very nice, so you can tell them your names.”

Their heads bob in response, before they start introducing themselves.

“U-Ushijima R-Ren,” says the boy with a small white rabbit pin on his uniform.

“N-nice to meet you, I’m Ushijima H-Hina,” answers the girl with a baby chick tag on her uniform.

“I’m A-Aoi. U-Ushijima Aoi,” mumbles the boy with the cat-shaped pin on his yellow hat.

The last Ushiwaka holds onto the fish tag on the edge of her uniform before she introduces herself. “M-my name is Ushijima K-Kiku-desu.”

“O-Oh, well how nice to meet you kiddos finally!”

Oikawa snorts at Bokuto’s uncharacteristic, flustered response. He doesn’t blame him though, because they’re overwhelmingly adorable (and for the nth time, Oikawa questions whether or not these toddlers are Ushiwaka’s biological children). 

“Okay, I really need to go. I should be back late tonight, but do let me know if something happens,” Ushijerry says, his soft expression from before immediately hardening.

Bokuto and Oikawa immediately straighten up to their full height, and say: “Yes sir!”

Ushiwaka nods at them and turns to walk away, but it seems like he’s stopped by four pairs of hands grabbing onto his legs. Ushijerry’s face softens at seeing his kids look up at him, and Oikawa doesn’t know whether he should melt at the scene, or puke at how uncharacteristically soft Ushijerry is. “Daddy, goodbye hug?” Aoi asks, his bottom lip slightly trembling.

Oikawa sees Bokuto literally faint in the corner, as they witness the Ushijima children each give their dad a hug before Ushiwaka truly leaves, and Oikawa and Bokuto are left alone with the Ushijima quadruplets.

“So kids, what do you guys want to do?” Oikawa asks.

…

Bokuto really doesn’t know what to do. For the past hour, he tried everything: playing with blocks, puzzles, volleyball even (since they do have six people). Sure, the tiny Ushiwaka’s did everything with no complaints, and currently, they seem content with drawing pictures, but they were way too quiet. Bokuto knows that Ushiwaka said they’re good kids, but aren’t they too good?!

And unfortunately, Bokuto still hasn’t gotten close to them. In fact, the kids haven’t cracked a smile in the past hour (though Bokuto swears that if they do, those smiles will be the cause of his death.) At this rate, they would run out of things to do before Ushiwaka comes back!

__

_~~(Bokuto forgets that five year olds need to nap and sleep at night)~~ _

“Bro, what are we going to do? They don’t seem to like us!” Bokuto ‘whispers’ to Oikawa.

Oikawa shares the same sentiment, since he’s just staring at them in surprise. “Dude, what has Ushiwaka been feeding them? They’re seriously too quiet! Wait, what if they are aliens? Hey, do you know if Ushiwaka married an alien?” Oikawa ‘whispers’ back.

Bokuto’s eyes widened at the idea. Maybe they were aliens? Or half alien, since Ushiwaka was human? Oh wait, they’re getting side-tracked here.

Bokuto looks at the tiny Ushiwakas, their gaze focused and intense while they’re drawing. It’s not until an idea forms in his head that he gestures to Oikawa. “Yo bro, I got an idea. Listen to this.”

When Bokuto spills his idea to Oikawa, he half-expects it to be rejected. But surprisingly, Oikawa agrees because he’s just desperate to do anything at this point.

Five minutes later, they get their plan ready. After five minutes, Oikawa gives Bokuto the signal, and that’s Bokuto’s cue. “Hey, hey, hey! Who’s ready for snack time? I don’t know about you, but I am ready for snack time!”

Four tiny heads look up at Bokuto, giving Bokuto their undivided attention. “I’m soooooo excited because I found these nice cranberries, but I don’t know how I can eat them all--there’s way too much! I definitely want to share it with some special little kiddos!”

They look on with slightly interested expressions, especially when they hear the word cranberries. Bokuto takes that as a good sign. He signals a thumbs up to Oikawa, cueing him to bring over the bowl of cranberries that they uncovered from Tendou’s storage (they quadrupled checked to make sure those cranberries were fresh and tasty, and not filled with the strange things Tendou normally puts in his food).

“Okay kids, gather around, and watch what we’re going to do.”

Bokuto grabs a handful of cranberries in his hand, and he hears Oikawa do a small drumroll in order to build the excitement. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees the tiny Ushiwakas staring at him. Bokuto takes it as a good sign, before then he says: “Here we go!”

At his mark, Bokuto starts “juggling” the cranberries into the air, his mouth open wide, and he tries to catch them in his mouth. During his attempt to juggle and eat cranberries at the same time, he fails to catch most of them, and it’s not until he chokes on one that Bokuto finally stops his act. In the midst of his choking, Bokuto notices the solemn stares that the kids were giving him.

No words are exchanged, but it is enough for Bokuto to feel embarrassed, and Oikawa is glad that he’s not on the receiving end of those serious (but cute) faces.

In a blink of an eye, Oikawa sees how Bokuto’s embarrassment leads him into emo-mode so quickly. “I’m a disgraceful being who should not even be alive now. I’m a failure as a human.” Bokuto mumbles, while Oikawa pats him on the back.

As they sulk in the corner, two of the tiny Ushiwakas clean up the stray cranberries that fell on the floor, and the other two arrange the other cranberries into tiny cups they found in their dad’s desk. Oikawa and Bokuto only notice all the Ushiwakas standing behind them when Hina tugs on their shirts.

Hina then hands out the cup of cranberries to Bokuto, who takes the cup. “H-Hina-chan?” Bokuto asks.

Holding her hands together in front of her, Hina shyly looks away from Bokuto as she responds. “D-daddy and M-mommy said it’s not good to waste food. A-and they also said it’s good to share with f-friends, especially when they’re sad.”

Bokuto is flabbergasted and Oikawa is frozen solid. However, that isn’t the end of it. Ren steps forward, his hands behind his back until he gives Bokuto and Oikawa a piece of paper. “R-ren-kun?”

The boy is already walking back to his siblings, leaving Bokuto and Oikawa to their own devices.

They look down at the page and realize it’s a picture of the tiny Ushiwakas with a taller man dressed in yellow that is leaping into the air and hitting his head on the ceiling, while there’s another man dressed in green who is in the corner with a tissue on his nose. Although the well-drawn picture (“ _was this seriously done by a five year old? He draws better than Takeru”_ \- Oikawa thinks to himself) showed the two of them doing dumb and stupid things, the pictures were honest and brought out warm feelings inside of their hearts.

It’s Kiku’s turn to present her gift of well-folded flowers ( _Where did these kids get their artistic genes from?_ Bokuto wonders): a yellow one for Bokuto and a green one for Oikawa. Oikawa and Bokuto are dying inside, almost unable to handle just how sweet they are, but of course, that wasn’t the end; after all, the tiny Ushiwaka’s do things together, as a group.

Aoi grabs onto Oikawa and Bokuto’s hands, looks up at them with his round, adorable, brown eyes, and says: “I-I like playing ball with Kou-nii and O-Oinka’a-nii. So p-please, don’t be sad.”

Receiving these gestures and listening to those words made Oikawa and Bokuto think that angels came down and purified their hearts. In fact, they are so touched, their tears literally start splashing out like a fountain.

~~~~~~~~~

After their impromptu crying session, the rest of the afternoon and evening went really well. While the children never smiled (probably because Ushiwaka never smiles), Bokuto and Oikawa start understanding them just a bit better: like how their auras seem to sparkle when they’re happy, or how their eyes get bigger and shine like the sun when they’re excited.

And during their afternoon nap, Oikawa’s phone was constantly being filled with pictures of the children sleeping together in little matching duck pajamas (and he sent them all to Tendou).

After naptime, Bokuto somehow found previous videos of their dad’s high school volleyball matches (much to Oikawa’s chagrin), so they ended up spending the rest of the afternoon watching these videos. Despite his initial displeasure of watching Ushiwaka beat Aoba Johsai in a match, Oikawa now has a new album on his phone filled with tiny Ushiwakas, who were watching the match with a large amount of sparkles surrounding them. Their auras seem to dazzle even more whenever they watch Ushiwaka score, or serve, or dive for the ball. (For now, Oikawa will let go of the fact that Ushiwaka beat his team back in the day, but only because his kids are cute when they see their dad score.)

They order take-out because Oikawa and Bokuto do not want to accidentally kill the little angels with whatever they’re making (even though they received disapproving faces from the tiny Ushiwakas). But the kids didn’t complain and didn’t waste their food, and they even helped clean up the table.

Oikawa wonders what the point of a babysitter is for these kids; they seem to be more put-together than some working adults?

However, things start taking a slightly different turn when bedtime comes around.

Despite the swaying on their feet, the children refused to go to bed. “Ren-kun, Aoi-kun, Hina-chan, Kiku-chan, you guys really need to go to bed. Good little kids need to sleep early or else they won’t grow.” Oikawa says.

The four of them aggressively shake their heads, causing them to somewhat lose their balance and fall on their bottoms. “Come on, you guys can barely stay up.” Oikawa tries coaxing them again.

He reaches over to the closest Ushiwaka (Ren) and picks him up. But unexpectedly, Ren starts kicking his tiny little legs around, though he doesn’t scream. “Hey kiddo, you really need to listen. You don’t want me telling your dad that you’re not being good, right?” Oikawa warns, trying to hold on to the small boy.

His warning gets Ren to still, and Oikawa gives out a sigh of relief. But a small tug on his pants gets him to look down to see a pout on a tiny face. “Kiku-chan?” he asks.

She only stares silently, glaring and pouting and Oikawa, and he doesn’t know what he did wrong. It’s when he feels a slight shaking in his arms that Oikawa notices that there’s a wet spot coming from the front of his shirt, and he realizes that Ren is crying. Yes, Ren was quiet, but those were definitely tears in his eyes, running down his cheeks, and what was even more heartbreaking was how his fist is curled up so tightly on the front of his shirt as if he was scared something will happen if he let go.

Oikawa feels his heart clench, and the tiny tug from little Kiku forces him to look down to see her also trying not to cry.

“To’u-nii, daddy said he’ll come back later tonight, right?” she asks him, her lips slightly wobbly, just like Oikawa’s heart is slightly wobbly too, finally realizing why they refused to go to bed.

Damn Ushiwaka, saying he will be back later that night, and damn Ushiwaka’s wife for giving their kids the super cute genes (Oikawa strongly believes that there’s not a single cute gene in Ushiwaka’s DNA). If it weren’t for Damn Ushiwaka and his wife and their fucking adorable kids, Oikawa wouldn’t have felt super guilty over making a kid cry.

He makes eye contact with the crying Bokuto who is glaring at Oikawa for making a precious child cry (though Oikawa agrees that this is 100% his fault).

“Sorry, sorry, I forgot! Kiku-chan, you’re totally right. Ushi- ah, your dad said he’ll be back later tonight. So why don’t we wait for him here?” Oikawa suggests.

Ren stops trembling and looks up with his tear-glazed eyes and squishable, wet cheeks. “Waiting okay?” he asks, his voice melting Oikawa’s heart so much, (and Oikawa thinks he’s going to die by the end of today).

“Y-yeah, it’s okay.” Oikawa answers.

“Oh that’s * _sniff*_ so cute. Oikawa, I’ll have words with you later! But Anyways! I have a genius idea! You guys wait here, and I’ll be right back!” Bokuto suddenly says.

He runs out of the office and after hearing spontaneous opening and closing of drawers, Bokuto suddenly comes back with a large amount of blankets and pillows. Seeing those items in his arms, Oikawa can guess what Bokuto’s genius idea is (and Oikawa can’t help but admit that it was a genius idea.)

Oikawa puts Ren down and goes to help out Bokuto with arranging the blankets and pillows over the ground and the sofa, while Bokuto also pulls over some chairs and boxes to help with the structure. After a couple of minutes, their creation was completed. “Well now, boys and girls: here’s the one, and only, amazing blanket fort! Made by yours truly, and my good friend Oinkawa-nii!”

Oikawa jabs an elbow at his ribs, making Bokuto double over at the sudden attack. However, the four tiny Ushiwaka's only stare back at them and they look over at the blanket fort, almost as though they were confused. Oikawa frowns and wonders if they screwed up, and they didn’t like it.

Hina then breaks the silence and asks: “What’s a blanket fort?” Oikawa and Bokuto gasp in response.

“You don’t know what a blanket fort is?! Have your parents not made something like this for you?!” Bokuto asks.

“Daddy and Mommy made us a ha-ha-hamck out of blankets and pillows.” Hina says.

What the fuck is a hamck? Wait, a hamck? Ha-m-ck? “It’s a thing that swings in the air, and it was soft, and fun, and '' Aoi yawns mid-sentence “w-warm.” he finishes before he rubs his eyes, trying to stay awake.

(Oikawa makes a mental note to himself to request for contacts or glasses that just takes pictures or videos on command.)

“Wow, Ushiwaka really goes above and beyond to make a fucking hammock out of blankets and pillows.” Oikawa mumbles under his breath.

Bokuto suddenly hits him at the back of his head and says: “No cursing in front of the children.” and Oikawa shuts up.

“Well, while it might not be swinging, it’s definitely soft, fun and warm. I promise you guys will like it. Plus, unlike hammocks, you have something like a tent over you. Think of it as your own small house or castle.” Bokuto assures them.

The tiny Ushiwakas look at one another, and Oikawa thought they would have to carry the children into the fort to convince them. However, the children suddenly hold hands with one another. With Hina in the lead, they patter toward the blanket fort, and slowly enter the fort. (The sight led to Oikawa running and grabbing a tissue in order to stop his nosebleed.)

By the time he takes care of his nose, the four are already settled down admiring the blanket fort. They’re especially taken with the glow-in-the-dark stars that Bokuto somehow was able to put on. Oikawa and Bokuto were quite satisfied with just watching them from outside when someone asks: “Is Kou-nii and To’u-nii not going to come in too?”

He doesn’t know who asked, but Oikawa is not going to deny an innocent request like that. In the end, both he and Bokuto somehow manage to squeeze into the fort with the four tiny Ushiwakas.

The peace and quiet was broken by one of the Ushiwakas asking: “To’u-nii, why didn’t you go to Shiratorizawa?”

Oikawa mentally curses in his head while Bokuto laughs out loud. Oikawa takes a deep breath in (preventing himself from cursing out loud) before he tries to give a simple answer. “Ah, that’s because I didn’t want to go to Shiratorizawa.”

“Why? Is Shiratorizawa a bad school?”

That was a different Ushiwaka asking (and he swears that Ushiwaka intentionally spawned four adorable creatures just to convince him he should’ve gone to damn-Shiratorizawa). “No, Shiratorizawa wasn’t bad. I just wanted to play volleyball with my friends who were going to a different school.”

“Was Daddy not your friend?”

Oikawa sweats because they weren’t friends, but if he said no, these kids will probably hate him for life. “A-ah, y-yes?” Oikawa squeaks.

“Mommy said lying is bad.”

Oikawa is really starting to think that maybe these kids are half-alien, and their mom is an alien. Seriously, how did they know he lied? In fact, he wonders which Ushiwaka Jr. said that?! They all sound the same.

“It’s okay if you and Daddy weren’t friends. Daddy and Mommy said not everyone will like us, and not everyone wants to be our friends.”

Oikawa starts to seriously question Ushiwaka’s parenting skills: after all, what kind of parent tells that to their 5 year old kids?!

“But they told us that the mean kids who don’t like us are not worth our time.”

Oh good Lord, Oikawa is going to track down these so-called “mean kids” and make sure they pay for harming these angels.

“And Mommy and Daddy said that the kids who like us for who we are, we need to treasure for life.”

Oikawa’s heart is turning gooey for the nth time today. “Do you kiddos even know what you’re saying?” he hears Bokuto ask, and although his tone was light, Bokuto is asking with an uncharacteristically serious voice.

“N-no, but daddy’s cool and mommy’s smart, so they say cool and smart things.”

Oikawa finds himself laughing. Of course, they’re getting lectured by five year olds who don’t understand what they’re saying.

“To’u-nii, are you my friend?”

Oikawa finds himself turning his head and he sees five pairs of eyes (including Bokuto’s, but he’s going to ignore him) staring at him, waiting for his response. He offers a smile and makes a ‘v’ sign next to his face. “Of course we’re friends. You guys are my best friends.” (On the other side of the world, Iwaizumi sneezes).

“But Daddy said when we grow up, we’re all going to Shiratorizawa.”

Oikawa Tooru knew he’s screwed. So screwed.

“So if we go to Shiratorizawa, will you go with us?”

Fuck Bokuto Koutaro for laughing at the situation he is in. Fuck Ushiwaka and his wife for procreating these four little wolves in sheep’s disguise. And fuck himself for what he says next: “I’ll try my best.”

(Somewhere in California, Iwaizumi sneezes four times, and he wonders if he’s caught a cold, or if Shittykawa is saying something stupid about him.)

~~~~~~

At 4am in the morning, the children are all cuddling with one another when the door opens and Ushiwaka enters with Tendou in tow. Tendou lets out a small whistle as he notices the impressively large blanket fort in the middle of the office. The two look inside to see two fully grown men and four little angels tucked in between them. “Well isn’t this a sight for sore eyes, Wakatoshi-kun?” Tendou asks.

Ushiwaka’s face is gentle and soft, and while he’s not smiling, Tendou knows that he’s really happy. He’s even got a sparkle in his eye.

As Ushiwaka walks over to the nest, Oikawa stirs awake, and that’s when he notices Ushiwaka. “Ushiwaka,” he greets, his sleepiness all gone.

Ushiwaka doesn’t correct him when he doesn’t call him by his code name, instead, choosing to respond back. “Oikawa. I see you’ve been busy.”

There was a brief moment of silence as Ushiwaka kneels down near his kids and adjusts the blanket to cover Aoi’s upper body.

“Oikawa.”

Oikawa looks over to see Ushiwaka suddenly bow to him. “Thank you. I’ll thank Bokuto as well, but I really appreciate you guys looking after them, even though it might have been something you didn’t want to do.”

Normally, Oikawa would’ve taken a picture of the moment of Ushiwaka bowing to him, just like with Tobio years ago. However this time, Oikawa just sits still before he touches the back of his neck out of nervousness, letting out a loud sigh. “Ah, you bastard don’t do something so out of character.”

Ushiwaka raises an eyebrow in confusion. “I’ve always expressed my gratitude in this way though?”

_Yes, but you never do it to me!_ Oikawa thinks to himself.

“Whatever, don’t worry about it. Like you said, they were good kids. Too good. Actually, is your wife an alien?”

This time Ushiwaka furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “She’s definitely human. We never keep secrets from one another, so if she was an alien, she would’ve said so by now. And also, didn’t we say that aliens can’t reproduce with humans?”

Oikawa shudders when the words “reproduce” leaves Ushiwaka’s mouth, trying to suppress the mental image that appeared. “Fine, fine. But yeah, they were good. You did well raising them I mean. Except did you really have to tell them that not everyone will be their friends? They’re only 5 years old.”

Ushiwaka seems surprised at what he said. “They told you about that?”

Oikawa suddenly feels like the room has turned really tense as Ushiwaka is suddenly very angry. “Calm down, Wakatoshi-kun. Remember, they’re not there anymore, so you don’t have to worry about it.” Tendou says, placing a hand on Ushiwaka’s shoulder in an attempt to distract him from his anger.

While Ushiwaka calms down, Tendou turns to Oikawa to explain. “A few months ago, these kiddos were bullied by their classmates, and I believe in the process, little Aoi got hurt.”

Oikawa suddenly recalls the ‘mean kids’ that they mentioned before.

“You’re serious?! They’re only five!” Oikawa ‘whispers’ loudly.

“Apparently it was just some childish jealousy, and these little tykes didn’t really care much for it.” Yes, Oikawa can definitely see that happening. “But that just riled up the kids even more, and so through anger and carelessness, the tiny Ushiwakas ended up getting hurt.”

Throughout Tendou’s explanation, Oikawa feels anger, but he also feels protective of the little Ushiwakas. In the span of only a few hours (Bokuto later argues that it was in minutes), Ushijima Wakatoshi’s kids have captured his heart and have him twirled on their small adorable fingers.

“Ushijima.”

This time, Ushiwaka and Tendou are startled at Oikawa, who properly called him by his last name. “If you need someone to look after them again, or someone to take them to school or pick them up from school, or even beat the crap out of bullies, I, well uh, I mean...I wouldn’t mind doing that.” Oikawa manages to get out, even though he doesn’t want to.

It was silent until Tendou laughed out loud and Ushiwaka might have smiled just a bit. “Thank you, Oikawa. I’ll think about it.”

It (most likely) might have been because Tendou was laughing so loudly, but there was a stir in the middle of the fort, and then one by one, each tiny Ushiwaka raises their head, rubbing sleepy eyes or blinking slowly before one of them manages to see Ushiwaka. “Daddy!”

Aoi jumps into his dad’s embrace first, and Oikawa is so surprised his mouth literally drops to the ground at seeing the little Ushiwaka smile as brightly as the sun. It was blinding. 

Aoi’s declaration wakes the other tiny Ushiwakas, and they’re all yelling and jumping and hugging (and Hina trips over Bokuto, waking him up in the process). There are a lot of smiles and sparkles, and Oikawa just lets his nose bleed. He can hear Bokuto cry loudly in the background, and is that Tendou wearing sunglasses in the corner? And where did that giant camera come from? 

“Did you guys have fun with Oikawa and Bokuto?” Ushiwaka asks, his expression so tender as he gazes at the little angels. 

“Ngh! To’u-nii and Kou-nii said that we're their best friends!” Kiku says, her hands grabbing onto her dad’s sleeves, and shaking his arm aggressively.

“Is that so? I’m glad to hear that.”

Fuck, it seems like the dad of the year will always go to Ushiwaka. The excitement and love these kids have for their dad is ridiculous.

“Yeah! And Dad, To’u-nii said that because we’re his best friends, he said he will go to Shiratorizawa with us!”

The words that Hina says cause a gradual, but explosive chain reaction. First, Ushiwaka’s entire body was frozen solid, and when he didn't move, his kids started crying, scared that they suddenly killed their dad. Then, Tendou drops the large camera onto the ground, throws his sunglasses off his face, and yells: “What the fuck Oikawa, is this true?!”

(“Tendou, language. There’s children.” Ushiwaka warns.

“Oops, sorry.”)

And lastly, Bokuto is laughing so hard: he rolls around on the ground, knocking down the pillows and some boxes that helped keep the blankets in place, and tangling the blankets between his legs. Somehow in the midst of his laughter and rolling, he accidentally hits a button on a wall, the same button that summons Daichi and Kuroo into the room in a matter of seconds.

Now Oikawa is in the middle of a room with crying children, an Ushiwaka who’s trying to comfort said children, a screaming Tendou, a hysterically laughing Bokuto, and two really sleep-deprived and cursing machine teammates (Daichi and Kuroo), and Oikawa really wants to get away, but he had more important things to do, such as: “KUROO SHUT UP, THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE.”

OMAKE:

_Eagle sent a photo to the Rainbros PIES chat_

_Neko: What the fuck is this? It’s so domestic and cheesy! And who are those kids in between you guys?_

_Owl: Yo Tendou! Thanks bro! That’s a sick picture! I’m going to make it my new wallpaper!_

_Crow: @Kuroo, I think those are Ushijerry’s children._

_Neko: Wait...When did Ushijerry have FOUR KIDS?!_

_Leaf: Ohohoho, you missed out, Kuroo-chan._

_Crow: *sigh* someone needs to get Kuroo informed with these things._

_Leaf sends 50 photos to the Rainbros PIES chat_

_Neko: Shit, those are super cute. But wow there are four of them. AND HOLY SHIT ARE THOSE MATCHING PAJAMAS. BRO, I WANT MATCHING PAJAMAS. LET’S GET SOME MATCHING PAJAMAS._

_Owl: SORRY BRO, BUT I ALREADY PLAN ON GETTING MATCHING ONES WITH THE TINY USHIWAKAS_

_Leaf: BOKUTO, LET ME IN ON THIS. I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO MATCH WITH THE TINY USHIWAKAS TOO._

_Owl: YOU GOT IT BRO. HERE’S SOME IDEAS I HAD. SOME OF THEM ARE ALIEN-THEMED TOO._

_Owl sent 10 links._

_Neko: WHO ARE THESE TINY USHIWAKAS AND WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO MY BROS_

_Eagle changed the groupchat name to: Tiny Ushiwakas Protection Squad_


End file.
